


Too Beautiful To Die For A Cause So Ugly

by RayenOfDeadStarsAndPlanets



Series: Cuddling Drabbles [3]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/M, Sadness, Sadstuck, very sadstuck, wow am i sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-01
Updated: 2013-10-01
Packaged: 2017-12-28 04:10:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,198
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/987500
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RayenOfDeadStarsAndPlanets/pseuds/RayenOfDeadStarsAndPlanets
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Disciple and The Signless's last night (day) together</p>
            </blockquote>





	Too Beautiful To Die For A Cause So Ugly

**Author's Note:**

> WHERE THE FUCK DID THIS EVEN TAKE OFF TO. I LOST ALL CONTROL OVER THIS TRAIN WRECK N ALL I CAN DO IS SIT BACK, WATCH AND TYPE THIS LIKE MAD.  
> THIS ONE IS GONNA HURT. I AM SO SORRY FOR THIS. IT HURT ME WRITING IT. GOODBYE FRIENDS I AM GONE.
> 
> EDIT BECAUSE SOME ASSHOLE.CHOOSE TO MAKE IT WORSE HERE.LISTEN TO THIS WHILE YOU READ; 
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ajd_vQvLeAY&feature=youtube_gdata_player

He comes to you in the middle of the night, like he always does.

“My darling, my beautiful darling.” He murmurs in your ear as he wraps himself around you tightly, and unleashes his sadness and burdens upon you.

_(not that you mind see. that’s why you love him.)_

He speaks to you of how much he adores you and how much he loves you and you hear in his voice, saying your name, saying your title, as if it’s a prayer, that tonight is the last night for you and he.

“They will take me tomorrow when the sun sets. This is our last night my beloved huntress, my beloved Disciple. I am tired of the fighting and the lies and of all the things wrong with this world. Is it so bad of me that I want something different for the next generation and the generations to come? I love my people, but they only love war.” He speaks carefully, face buried in your hair and you feel his tears, his vibrant, candy-red tears soak your skin.

Rolling over to face him in his arms, with you wishing so, **_SO_** hard that things would be different. You wish upon the suns in the sky that he wouldn’t reveal himself. You wish upon wishes themselves that you could have one more night. But you take what you have been blessed with.

“My love, don’t say such things. The people love and worship you, but they are simply trolls born and raised to be weapons. Born and raised to be to warmongers. And look how you’ve changed all of that! You have Neophyte Redglare, one of the best legislacerators and matespirit of the _Grand Highblood_ behind you as well as your beloved moiral Ψiioniic. Your inner circle is the best in the land and there is rumors that Marquise Spinneret Mindfang is on her way to join your cause. There are many who would follow you into death, myself included!” You _~~(shout)(yell)( **SCREAM** )~~ _say carefully.

He sighs against your forehead, a sigh that held the weariness of a thousand souls, one that spoke of his exhaustion, the kind that spoke of a soldier who had been fighting his entire existence and was sick of the fighting and the bloodshed.

The kind those on death row, who know their time is nigh, sigh.

“And that my love, is the problem. Do not wish death upon yourselves because of me. Not because of me, not for me. You are too beautiful to die for a cause as ugly and violent as this. This has never been your fight. Please don’t die for my cause, do not die for my mistakes. None of this is what I wanted! I wanted peace between blood castes. I wanted no one to die. Not for me. Never for me.” He mourns, staring up at her, tears racing down his face. “I’m old and tired. What I am to do, will send waves through the pond that will sweep over you and Ψiioniic and Dolorosa and…I want the shedding of my blood to be the last blood spilt for this cause, till this world is ready for change. And I have seen the one who will bring about the change this world needs. And he will be glorious and he will be morials with a highblood and he will be mine and of my blood.” He spoke with the voice he used for his sermons, preaching to her of things yet to come.

_(and you weep inside and on the outside. you have always known this was to come, you didn’t expect it so soon.)_

Olive tears fall from your eyes as you press kisses across his face. “Please, let us not talk about these heartbreaking things any longer. Let us sleep. Tomorrow will come when it comes and we will handle it then and a not a moment before.” You says, voice cracking and sobs escaping your throat.

“My beautiful, brave, strong Disciple.” He sighs. “You have been with me for a very long time and you have followed my orders to the letter. So grant a dead troll’s last wish. Do not come with me to the speech tomorrow. Stay hidden away. They will send E%ecutor Darkleer for us. I have seen what is to happen. My beautiful huntress,” He says stroking your face lightly. “Do not follow me. Not this time. I beg of you.”

_(he knows you’ll say no and follow him, you can see it in his eyes and as much as it breaks your heart you’ll lie to him.)_

“I…of course I’ll stay. But promise me you’ll come back to me?”

_(you’ll lie to him the way he’s going to lie to you. to protect and comfort.)_

“Don’t I always?”

_(‘NOT THIS TIME’ you want to scream and shout and rage and cry. because this is the end for him and for you and Ψiioniic and Dolorosa and for everyone involved. and it would be **bloody**.)_

The next night as the sun set, as he preaches, you stand hidden from sight as the guards descend on him like wolves.

You watch as he’s tortured and put on display as a mutant, as a creature, something to be culled

_(you know better though. you have always known better)_

and you wince as he’s shot with a dark blue arrow

_(you knew that the E%ecutor would be here. YOU KNEW IT AND YET YOU STILL FLINCH and you are ashamed.)_

and you see him die and you hold back tears

_(and you know when the E%ecutor sees you)_

and you know when he had you in his sights and he points the arrow and you look down at the leggings that you’re not sure how you got they in your hands and you’re ready to die for your _ ~~(his)(their)~~_ cause.

But he stops and jerks his head in a direction away from the havoc and you know, **_you know_ , **this is what your beloved Signless, _(now the Sufferer, oh how you **hate** that name)_ knew what would happen and he wanted this choice out of your hands.

_(but in doing so, you took the choice back.)_

You flee and hide in the caves that held the most memories of your Signless

_(the place you spent your last night)_

and you mourn and rage and cry

_(oh how you cry)_

and you remember the task whispered to you in the dead of night. The one that he asked of you.

_(live. live and remember and record. and don’t waste your life away. weep over me yes, but do not mourn for me, for i am free. free from hate and disgust and anger.)_

“And I, like always, will follow his wishes and write and record his sermons and I do so gladly.”

And with the blood of slain creatures you paint the walls of your caves with the words of your beloved Signless _(not the Sufferer, never that name.)_

and you wait for your death day so that you could be with your beloved

and you wait for the savoir that Alterian needed so desperately.


End file.
